
Monday, August 04, 2008

Wednesday, July 30, 2008
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John O'Reilly hoisted his beer and said, 'Here's to spending the rest of me life between the legs of me wife!' That won him the top prize at the pub for the best toast of the night! He went home and told his wife, Mary, 'I won the prize for the Best toast of the night' She said, 'Aye, did ye now. And what was your toast?' John said, 'Here's to spending the rest of me life, sitting in church beside me wife.' 'Oh, that is very nice indeed, John!' Mary said. The next day, Mary ran into one of John's drinking buddies on the street corner.
The man chuckled leeringly and said, 'John won the prize the other night at the pub with a toast about you, Mary.' She said, 'Aye, he told me, and I was a bit surprised myself. You know, he's only been there twice in the last four years. Once he fell asleep, and the other time I had to pull him by the ears to make him come.'
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Cardiologist's Funeral
A cardiologist died and was given an elaborate funeral. A huge heart covered in flowers stood behind the casket during the service. Following the eulogy, the heart opened, and the casket rolled inside. The heart then closed, sealing the doctor in the beautiful heart forever. At that point, one of the mourners burst into laughter. When all eyes stared at him he said, "I'm sorry, I was just thinking of my own funeral.........I'm a gynecologist." The proctologist fainted!
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It's a long weekend for us here in Canada so to my fellow Canuks enjoy the long weekend.....to everyone else have fun at work on Monday tee hee!!
Sunday, July 27, 2008
So KFC has a new "vegetarian" sandwich on their menu. It's interesting as I receive email message boards from an animal rights group where some members are to one extreme and other members are a little more lax with their choices. There was much discussion on this new sandwich that got me thinking about my choices. Wednesday, July 23, 2008
The cashier explained to the woman that the product could not be guaranteed after that date....as well the woman didn't even have a receipt to boot and when asked of her purchase date she lost it. She started ranting about how this was unacceptable, this was inconvenient for her to have to come all the way out to return a moldy product, she's busy you know and this was the only possible day she could come back......and......she needed this dealt with immediately because her son was in sailing school and she had to go and pick him up pronto.
So there I'm standing in total and utter disbelief....seriously....you bring something back 8 days later and complain that it's moldy.....bread that let's be honest came from a health food store and probably doesn't have a wack of preservatives in it if any. I'm assuming that this elitist woman can pay for another $3 loaf of bread if she can send her son to sailing school. I felt like giving her $20 bucks and telling her to shut the fuck up.
I have no idea what happened as my purchase was dealt with and I left the poor cashier with the unreasonable dragon lady. I did give her a sympathetic smile and raised my eyebrows towards the bitchy lady. I would have piped up but clearly this woman just didn't get it.
Sunday, July 20, 2008
I was also struggling with what to do about the damage. It's minimal I get that.....but every time anyone has ever hit my car (I was parked on a street and someone rammed into me, I was hit while driving another time) I've generally had the "it's ok" attitude, not too much damage, don't worry about it......granted that was with my older car. I realize if I keep doing such things I'll be driving around a beat up shit box in no time and I'm sick of it. I don't really have any experience with such a thing insurance wise but I'm waiting to hear back from them tomorrow. I'm sure they will laugh at me regarding the small amount......but we'll see. Why should I have to pay a cent when someone rammed into me???
Other than that I've decided to stop reading blogs at work. I generally do it when I'm taking a break and have some down time, however it was hinted at our last staff meeting that personal use of the computer was being taken advantage of. No one ever came out and said anything per se, however my boss had written it on the agenda that we pass around just before our meetings (which we all read prior to in case we have anything to add) and then she never brought it up!! I'm assuming it was some type of hint and well......I'm taking it!!
Monday, July 14, 2008
First and foremost is a Pedegg. It's this strange little contraption that quite resembles a cheese grater only it's for your feet. Apparently it's one of those "as seen on TV" gadgets which normally I'd balk at however this little devil works like a charm. I've never had smoother feet in my life!!
I've been reading Eat Pray Love by Elizabeth Gilbert and I'm really enjoying her story. I'm not going to go into great detail about the book but it's almost a like a travelogue about a woman's journey after her divorce. She had many things (husband, successful career, great home) that many women would want however she was unhappy and unfulfilled. Following her divorce she decided to go on a journey around the world to find herself and happiness: "Pleasure in Italy, devotion in India and on the Indonesian island of Bali, a balance between worldly enjoyment and divine transcendence." (taken from the back cover as I haven't read that far ahead, I'm still in Italy). Thus far it's well written and I'm enjoying her adventure and self discovery. I mean how many people would just up and leave their life for a year to be completely devoted to themselves and their personal growth. Most would consider that selfish however I think it's a phenomenal idea.
(I've never even seen a BBQ like this but it sure is fancy)Lastly of course is a great BBQ. It's kind of like a staple in the summer, sort of like a nice raging fire in the winter. Everything tastes better on the BBQ, yummy corn, veggies with seasoning, dogs, burgers, toasted buns (did that make anyone laugh).........you get the idea. As well, often times friends will get together for a BBQ which is another great excuse to socialize and enjoy the weather with loved ones.
What are you into right now??
Thursday, July 10, 2008
I have to let out a little steam so bear with me. Sunday, July 06, 2008
Camping...
Monday, June 30, 2008

(Obviously not me haha!!)Monday, June 23, 2008

1st someone was telling us about this homeless man who would always tell the same joke. He would ask people to give him a dollar if he could tell them where they got their glasses, "you got them on your face" he would reply hand outstretched. H suggested the man get a new joke like "hey I can tell you where you got your pants." I then told H that this would be a ridiculous joke, how could the homeless man possibly make any money trying to guess the various stores where one buys pants. H said "Oh Ashley.....on your legs, you got your pants on your legs" Doh!
2nd we were making the 6 hour trek back to Vancouver from Portland after the party. We stopped at a rest area and I took my empty Starbucks cup with me to the washroom to discard. Strangely there were no garbage cans in the washroom so I wandered around outside searching with no luck. I approached H and J and placed my cup on the picnic table. Not one to be a litter bug I shrugged my shoulders and explained my dilemma looking to them for answers. H pointed to a group of large bins that resembled recycle bins. I told him that I had seen the same bins across the way and they had a sign attached that said Auto Litter Only. I wandered over to this new group of bins and walked back cup in hand. Nope, these signs say the containers are for Auto Litter Only as well! They both just stared at me until H asked what type of auto litter I thought they were for "like oil?" he asked. I said I wasn't sure, I guess like old mufflers, flat tires etc. I then realized the stupidity of not only my answer but it clicked in that Auto Litter Only meant litter from ones car duh!!
Anyone else have any blonde moments lately??
Friday, June 20, 2008
I was in food heaven as well on this vacation as the city seemed to have quite a few veggie options which I loved!! I went to Naam ( a 24/7 vegetarian restaurant) on Rawbeans advice and loved the noodles, as well I've always wanted to try the butter chicken sauce sans chicken at an Indian restaurant. I got the chance to do so at Annapurna a vegetarian Indian restaurant which simmered veggie balls in a butter chickenish sauce which was so freaking good. I also branched out and tried an oyster burger (pictured above). The burger was really quite tasty and messy as hell.
Though I did sample a few items :)
Monday, June 16, 2008
The East side was shocking....absolutely shocking, there are no other words for such a thing. We walked about 10 mins out of Gas Town which was a cute little area into the depths of despair. I work in one of the most impoverished cities in Canada and I was astounded by this area. It seemed as though every homeless person and addict had taken refuge in a 2 block radius. It was the amount of people in such a small area that really got to me. I've seen it on TV in documentaries, I have heard about the problems there but I was not prepared at all for what I saw. It was really quite sad.
In the evening we prepared for an upcoming road trip to Portland where we were to attend a circus/carnival themed party and were set to dress up as chickens. There were feathers all over poor H's apartment as we sewed these ridiculous headdresses well into the evening.

On Friday we ventured the 3 hours to Seattle to visit Wiwille and were lucky enough to catch a ride with H's friend. Wiwille was a gentleman in every sense of the word. He bought me a copy of Casablanca as I've told him about a thousand times "I'll watch it I swear" and I've never gotten around to doing so. Every time we were about to enter his car, he would open our door first and then make his way in. I really enjoyed our lunch on the water and can imagine the place would be great to sit out and have a nice cold drink on a beautiful day.
We wandered around the city where H was hellbent on me seeing the Library and this Olympic Sculpture park ..... which after walking through I despised. It was ridiculous, there were maybe 3 sculptures and the rest were these over sized orange cones, needless to say a fan I was not. The library was rather impressive; they brought their mascot ( a chicken doll) and took photos of her in every possible nook and cranny, it was quite amusing as I'm sure people were wondering what the hell they were doing.
In the evening we had some dinner and then my 3 companions seemed to fade quickly. I was ready for a night on the town and they were all yawning and practically falling asleep at 10pm, lightweights!!!
We headed out to Portland the following day for carnival fun. The party deserves it's own post and photos to accompany which I am not able to do at this time.
So all and all the trip has been good. On the way home from Oregon (6 hour drive) with lots of thinking time I started to feel bad about Seattle.....I had Wiwille take his time to give me this list of things to do....and then we didn't do any of them. Sorry!!! It was later in the day by the time we arrived, my companions didn't really want to spend too much moolah and I was a bit tired.
I think he should come to Van after work today and call in sick tomorrow to get his drink on !!!
Monday, June 09, 2008

I bought these cute bermuda shorts a few weeks ago that I’m really digging however, there’s a bit of a problem. As I was walking down the looonnnnggg barren hallway to my office this morning I noticed a *swish swish* sound. Apparently I’ve turned into George Costanza……..dammit!!
I actually started to laugh out loud while walking down the hall. I thought it was hilarious and reminded me of that Seinfeld episode where George is trying to impress his prospective boss however his discounted suit makes that *swish swish* sound.
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(Clearly not my photo, I found it on the good ole net)I am leaving this week for my vacation which I’m very much looking forward to. Mountains and fresh air what could be better? I have Wiwille booked as my tour guide for a day and will surely drink him under the table in the evening. Watch out buddy, watch out!! We Canucks have the strong stuff over here! (Clearly this sentence is going to bite me in the ass later, we all know i'll have like three drinks and pass out) I'm also hoping to meet up with Rawbean which shouldn't be a problem at all, I believe she lives right around the corner from my friend. Other than that I have a large outdoor circus themed party to attend in Portland with my friend. Apparently people dress up and there's a dunk tank, kissing booth etc. Last years pictures look like a lot of fun but I will have to find a costume between now and then. Any suggestions?
Wednesday, June 04, 2008
Music Meme
List seven songs you are into right now. No matter what the genre, whether they have words, or even if they’re not any good, but they must be songs you’re really enjoying now.
I am a huge fan of NIN and every few months or so I toss in a CD and let it play for weeks at a time. I can't decide between songs so i'm picking three (which will make my list longer than 7) Trent is looking hot and sweaty in this first video....he makes me tingle ;)
Terrible Lie
Hurt
Right Where It Belongs
The Killers
Uncle Jonny
The Who
Baba O'Riley
Jefferson Airplane
White Rabbit
Janet Jackson
Feedback
I have this one on my MP3 player for the gym.
Evanescence
Good Enough
I totally have a crush on Amy Lee, this song however makes me a little sad sometimes.
Coldplay
A Rush of Blood to the Head

Feel free to complete this meme as well. And no snickering or mocking of my choices....you know who you are (that's right, i'm pointing at you). At least I didn't throw any Nickelback in there haha!!
Sunday, June 01, 2008
It's actually a very cool set-up with 3 courts on the beach and games running all day long. There are anywhere from 40-70 people around, playing, lounging, drinking. They have this enormous fire pit (which was totally needed today it was freaking cold out there) and a band that comes out to play while the games are going on.
We played about 10 games in 7 hours and get this.......we won every single game we played!!! Oh the joy!!! Of course it helped that we had 3 young guys on our team ( one was like 6' 5 ) and they were competitive as hell.
Dusk was setting in and the championship game was upon us. We clearly had an advantage. The opposing team only had 5 players and each were creeping well into their 60's. Guess what folks....they killed us. The score was like 20-5 or something horrendously embarrassing. Apparently this team plays every year and every year they win, shockingly 2008 was no different.
(My sad "we came in 2nd place" face)
(Yet another burn even though I wore SPF 45)
I had a great time however I came home with a bit of a burn and I'm pretty sure my entire body hates me. My forearms are swollen and spotted from bumping and and I feel like I could pass out at any moment I'm so tired. Apparently old age is creeping up haha it's 9PM and i'm going to bed!!
