Awkward Men

Why is it that when a bunch of us go out.....never seems to fail there is someone lurking around us, generally an unattractive/old yucky man with a number of horrible qualities that i shall not care to list at this time as there are too many to choose from. Let me just describe the 3 from this past week.

1) I am out with a male and a female friend chatting, having a drink when all of a sudden i hear a whisper in my ear. "you are the most beautiful person in this whole bar." Ohhhh i hear an Irish accent, can't be that bad right. He offered to buy me a drink, i declined, thanked him for the compliment and went outside with my friends. Well, Mr. Ireland followed us out, proceeded to tell me all evening how beautiful and lovely i was, told us how he owned cottages in Spain and of course went to school and was friends with Colin Farrell (yeah right). He bought us all drinks, dropped them all over himself and bought us more. He was alright to chat with but I was not interested like that. He bought me a rose, tried to kiss me at our next location all the while i was barely talking to him and told him to get his face away from mine. My other female friend was polite, talked to him and by the end of the evening he was telling her that God brought him to me to meet her LOL. Our male friend just smirked and told him we were both single.

2) There was a group of us out on Thursday evening for a few bevies. This random guy comes up and starts belting out "Sweet Caroline" to us. Oh no, we thought. Inside our suitor was then on the dance floor, oh what a sight. He was so awkward and did this strange jerking shoulder movement, one of us would turn around and there he would be smiling away, and there we would go to the other side of the dance floor. We also saw the same gentleman on Saturday night. My one friend engaged him in conversation so i could take a picture of him, he told her he loved Karaoke and guess what his favorite song was "Sweet Caroline" He was alone at the bar and i imagine he will remain alone at bars for a very long time to come.

3) I did not have the pleasure of chatting with this particular gentleman although he was passed among three of my friends. One would go up to try and save the other and the 1st person would leave the 2nd chatting with him. He apparently worked for Shania Twain, did not want his picture taken because "people know me" and his sister was married to someone in Alice Coopers band....rock on!! He had glasses, this terrible bushy bushy beard and his shirt was unbuttoned. Melissa told him to do it up cause his nipples were showing and he proceeded to push out his chest and show us all his nipples...i think he rubbed them as well. He looked like a 60 year old roadie and said he was single and looking for love.....