I got a phone call the other day while I was at work. Please keep in mind all of my clients are at least of legal age to drive in the country.

C: "If I work from 8am to 12pm, how many hours is that?"

Me: "Four"

C: sounding a bit perplexed "Four?"

Me: stunned "Yes four"

Silence.......

Me: "Do you have any other questions"

C: "no"

Then I read this wonderful article in the newspaper. It made me laugh so hard as I can only imagine the cops watching the events unfold and the looks on their faces: (A RIDE check is where police examine drivers for signs of drinking and driving)

"Police conducting a R.I.D.E. program at 2 a.m. watch a man in a bar parking lot drive over a curb to the next parking lot to avoid the line. The driver lost the car bumper in the process and got out to retrieve it. After putting it in the backseat he was approached by officers. A 22-year-old man faces an impaired driving charge. "

These people are the future of our country folks!!! Have a great weekend!!

Goal List Update

Goal list update:

Working On:


#35 Read all of the unread books on my shelf 8/35

I finally finished reading Eat Pray Love and did indeed love the book very much. Elizabeth Gilbert made me want to drop everything and go and experience life to the fullest. I felt like I was there every step of the way with her through her spiritual journey and now want to follow her lead. I really do need to cleanse my body of all of its negative thoughts and little balls of anger that seem to be stuck inside of me......it's a heavy burden to carry day in and day out. I want to feel light and enjoy life, perhaps I'll start with a little meditation!!



#5 Achieve a BMI of 24.9 or less

I dropped my BMI (according to the computer) by another .7 points which doesn't seem like a lot however I was really surprised and delighted by the number on the scale......like really excited. I'm finally dropping weight again and it feels damn good!!! I actually have high hopes in this area which is surprising. My obstacle of course will be summer.....outdoor patios, parties, time off. Everybody seems to want to hit the patios for pints in the warm weather not to mention dinner outside and of course house parties. I just need to watch A) how much of this I do and B) the late night drunk munchies. This summer will be a test!!! I'm doing poorly already as I have been invited to 4 different parties in the next few weeks which I have RVSP'd YES to!!!


Completed:


#1 Ride a Mechanical Bull


I had imagined that I would be riding one of those big mechanical bulls like they have in the bars. There is actually a place near me where you can pay $10 and ride one at an indoor amusement type of place. I however chose to ride one in a mall while shopping in Vegas. Not quite what I had in mind but LD put it on the highest level and off I went. Just to be fair I will ride a big one as well but technically this goal has been completed.



#2 Get an RRSP


I recently set up my RRSP's which was much less painful than I had imagined. You see I figured I would get overwhelmed and confused by the information set forth and therefore always put it off (even though it's super important to have). I mean who knows if I'll live another 30 years but just in case I do there should be some sort of retirement fund waiting for me (and now there is).


#15 Stop going to obligated events (IE weddings I don't care about)

I have turned down a myriad of invitations to such things in the past year and a half and it feels great. I was invited to a wedding shower of a person I had not (have not) seen in oh 7 years no thanks! Wedding for the same person.....nope not going. Wedding for another person I haven't seen in about 10 years ... nope! Baby shower for an acquaintance....sorry I'm busy. I refuse to attend such things for people I barely see and am not friends with.

#58 Wear sunscreen everyday for one month 31/31

I started this goal in May which was a good month to start as the weather was getting warmer and I was away in a hot locale for a portion of it. This of course meant that for at least a week I was guaranteed to be wearing the stuff. I just had to make sure to wear it for the other 3 weeks which shockingly I did!

A few of my favorite things:




I went to Sephora as I had seen this bronzing body shimmer in a magazine however completely forgot the article when I went shopping. The saleswoman suggested an alternative Celebutante by Tarte. It's a moisturizing dry-oil shimmer spray that smells like coconuts. Seriously I want to lick my arm every time I put it on. It's perfect for summer as it smells like the beach as well it's shimmery and sexy. I love it!!



Seriously people it's getting hot out and of course to my thighs dismay the fry trucks are up and running. There's nothing I love more than fries smothered in gravy and cheese from a fry wagon. Yum yum!! I of course will limit my intake of poutine accordingly this summer however I am delighted to have had a taste already.

My new favorite summer drink is Bud Light with Lime!!! Apparently it's been around for a good year (who knew) however I first tried it while I was on vacation last month. The funny thing is in the past week I've been to visit two friends both of whom cracked open a bottle for me to try with a big smile. They were super excited about their new find; Hmm dude that's sooooo last week I've already tried it. (But I do love it!!)

Clearly I should have just labelled this post my favorite things to eat and drink in the summer because number four is a super yummy lemon square made by a local woman. Seriously....she makes the best deserts ever!! For me it's a toss up between this lemon square and the ginormous smores bar that she makes. Soooo good!!

I've also recently started wearing flip flops for the 1st time and I *gasp* really like them. I used to have issues with the bit that sticks between the toes and would last all of 5 seconds in a store with them on. I caved, bought a cheap pair with a soft toe thingy (what the fuck is it called...the thong....is that what makes them a thong?) and voila I am enjoying them. Perfect for summer!!!

There was some miscommunication between myself and my gym partner recently which landed me in my 1st ever spinning class sans buddy.

The teacher asked if anyone was new and I of course was the only one with my hand in the air. She came over, adjusted my seat and bars asked my name and off we went. Well a few minutes into the class she bellowed over her mic "Miss A how are you doing?" I could feel everyone staring at me as I gave her a smile. This went on for the remainder of the 45 min class, every so often she would shout out a name and the person would reply with a thumbs up. It appeared to be a group of people that regularly take this particular class and they have built a rapport with the instructor and she with them.

I enjoyed myself (as much as one can) while working up a sweat and I did get one hell of a workout. I thought my legs were going to collapse on more than one occasion while I had my ass off the seat and was pretending to climb some gigantic hill at a ridiculously fast pace. Unfortunately I'm not one of those people that tries to test the waters so to speak; I like to dive right in. If I'm going to do something......then I'm really going to do it. Perhaps a bit silly as my ass and legs hurt for a few days after the class. I probably should have toned it down a notch until my body had worked up to such a pace.

On our last set the instructor again yelled out my name "Miss A's in the lead, she's taking us to the finish line go go go" and again the rest of the class stared however the stares were friendly and came with knowing smiles. The girl in front of me turned around and smiled, a man who I could see only in a mirror smiled and nodded as did others. Phew it was over!!

My legs felt like jello as I slowly slid my body off of the bike. My arms were aching, my ass and thighs were throbbing. Clearly I haven't been working anywhere near my potential lately at the gym which I am well aware of. I've been content to run on the treadmill 4 times a week. I did however start the stair climber recently to mix it up a bit and give my legs a good burn. I've found something else now to keep me interested and apparently it burns a hell of a lot of calories in a short period of time which is a huge bonus! As I was leaving the instructor asked "Will we see you again next week?" to which I replied "Yes." There were more smiles from the group as they knew I was hooked!

Ughhh last week I was standing in line at a drugstore that shall remain nameless with ONE item in my hand. I stood in line behind 4 people however noticed only one woman in the other line and moved over behind her.....big mistake!!!

First of all she had a cart with about 10 items in it which really wasn't a huge deal but then she pulled out a bloody lottery ticket. The cashier had to go halfway across the store to check it and let the woman know that she had won so much money. The woman then starts to ponder hmmmm I should buy more numbers....which numbers should I buy......should I get a quick pick....... (this went on forever). The cashier had to go halfway across the store to deal with the lottery ticket again! At this point I see the fourth man from the other line leaving the store and this woman hasn't even cashed out her purchases yet.

Finally the cashier returns and begins to cash her out. "Are those on sale, I thought they were on sale?" You've got to be fucking kidding me!!! Now she doesn't know if the items she's purchasing are on sale. Thankfully she doesn't care and buys everything in her cart regardless. Then comes the money exchange.....cashier "that will be $74.56" woman starts digging through her change purse to get the exact change "here you go $74.79" cashier "no 56" woman "ohhhh" starts recounting the change.

I wanted to kill myself.

Sidenote: This happened AGAIN today with 2 assholes in front of me trying to figure out the amount of points on their cards. The cashier took a few minutes to explain the points process to this woman and then had to find the amount on two of her cards. The the next customer (who had a cart full of shit) went through the exact same process and actually stood there and said "oh so I have to buy $30 more in order to redeem all of the points hmmmmm can you hold my purchases?"The two people behind me were about to lose their shit as we had all been waiting a good 10 minutes to pay for a few items.

I only go to this particular drugstore as it's right beside my gym and therefore convenient but as you can see it's really not convenient at all. I'll have to find another place to go as I've already wasted a good hour standing in line at this drugstore in the last few weeks. I can't possibly imagine getting behind another such person as I've reached my breaking point for stupidity at this place, it wouldn't be a good scene.

*If I see someone in line with one or two items and I have a cart full then I ask if they would like to go ahead of me.

*The amount of points is written right on the receipt. I make my purchase, check it out and think oh goodie I can redeem 15,000 points next purchase and get $10 off.

*The balance of points can be checked online.....perhaps these mofos could have done that previous to their shopping excursion ( of course I'm being an elitist and assume that they have a computer).

Thanks for all of the input on the last post. I'm sure I'll talk to a few of you further about the options and pros and cons of each device before I make a decision. I'm in no rush to buy anything at the moment but it's something I've wanted to gather more info on.


The weather around here has been rather confusing as of late. I left for work this morning with a spring jacket on, heater in the car turned slightly towards the red zone and windows all the way up. I left my office at 3pm to attend a meeting out in the community and all of a sudden I'm sweating like a pig. Forget the bloody jacket I opened the windows (which did nothing) and turned the air conditioning on so I wouldn't arrive to my meeting with slick hair and pit stains. It would be lovely if for once summer would just arrive, I don't do well with 2 degrees in the morning and 25 in the afternoon. It's hard to dress for the day unless you wear layers which I'm really not that into.

Anyway enjoy the weekend! I have a friend working on my car at some point and plan to read my ass off to catch up on one of my goals. I will also be a slave to the gym this weekend.....I know you're all jealous, don't pretend that you're not!! I might even head out for a bike ride weather permitting. Cheers!!

I have been toying with the idea of purchasing a laptop sometime in the near future. Now keep in mind I am a creature of habit I don't like to step out of my comfort zone and have always used a PC. I know Macs seem to be all the rage as of late but really are they that much better???



I asked a computer nerd friend of mine a while back and he said either would be fine.....thanks for the sound advice! Did I mention that I am the most indecisive person on the face of the earth?? Well I am and trying to decide on anything for me can be a rather punishing task.



I don't know much about Macs at all....I've used them at friends houses and they seem alright. I know that there are certain features that don't necessarily work well or at all with other computers. My friend has a Mac and his web cam isn't compatible with MSN or something like that....peanuts in the grand scheme of things but annoying nonetheless. I would prefer that everything works now just as it always has new computer or not.



So first thing to get out of the way, should I purchase a Mac or a PC?



If I go the PC route there are a million different brands to choose from. Now I've always been a Dell girl and have never had an issue with any of my computers. It also gives me some comfort to see their logos well everywhere, my bank uses them, my college used them......they seem to be good and reliable. That being said I'm not opposed to trying something new....perhaps cheaper!! My friend bought an Acer on sale and loves it, another has an HP Pavilion and loves it.



Advice....I need advice! So any computer savvy folk out there your input would be greatly appreciated. Thanks a million!

So in my last post I asked for funny stories and Christielli mentioned a silly thing that she did while shopping in Winners that made me laugh:

Okay, here's a random funny story. Once I was in Winners w some friends and I saw a nice pair of shoes on the ground and I'm like "Wow! These are awesome" and I took off my shoes and tried them on. Little did I realize that there was some lady beside me trying on shoes and she was like "ummm, those are *my* shoes."

It reminded me of the time (probably 15 years ago) that I was standing in Mc Donalds after ordering and waiting for my food. The cashier put a tray on the counter with some fries and a pop on it (soda for the Americans). I start to eat a few fries when she places a Big Mac on the tray. Hmmm I didn't order a Big Mac.....then I see an arm reach in and a voice say "excuse me". Yeah I was totally eating off of this guys tray and to make matters worse it was an older guy from my high school. He didn't seem to care but I was mortified.

Last year (why is it always with food??) I was at a hotel and they had one of those continental breakfasts with muffins, coffee and tea. Anyway I see a plate with a few bagels on it and I'm rather dismayed as the bagels have raisins in them and I really don't like raisins but I'm hungry and figure I'll just have to suck it up, pick them out and eat the bloody thing. So I take a bagel off the plate when again a hand reaches in.....dammit I did it again!! Some guy had left his plate lying around while he went to get some coffee and for whatever reason I assumed it was the bagel plate. He laughed and didn't seem to mind however I was pissed as I was stuck with this nasty bagel when there was a large quantity of non raisin bagels at my fingertips. I couldn't possibly put it back or worse yet place it back on his plate though I really really wanted to. Can you imagine "here you go sir, you can have it back now I didn't want this one anyway. "

Photo is from http://www.worldofstock.com/

I'm dying for something funny to happen....anything!!! You know when you laugh so hard you cry, snort and gasp to catch your breath. It's been a while and I'm patiently waiting for something amusing to fall upon me.....come on now....anytime....I'm waiting......

I left my car in a parking lot on the weekend after having a few too many beverages. I picked it up in the morning, ran some errands and after about 5 hours noticed something taped to the back of my car. It was this huge sign regarding a Parks and Recreation meeting, clearly someone at the bar thought it would be funny to tape it to my trunk.....and it was....I had a good giggle over how silly I must have looked all day and imagined the people behind me squinting to read this big announcement and wondering why it was placed there (squinting to read a big announcement.....is that a bit of an oxymoron??). It was funny but not the kind of funny where I cry I'm laughing so hard though I suppose it's a start.

Perhaps something hilarious will happen this weekend though I am planning to keep a low profile and stay in. Granted, I also planned for that last weekend and ended up at a BBQ, a surprise party and then at a friends house sans car (among other things) due to my consumption of Keiths where it got a little messy.......damn you Keiths!!!

Funny stories anyone....anyone???

We visited a lot of art galleries while we were on vacation and I wanted to share some of my new favorite artists with you. I'm a Van Gogh girl, I just adore him however I do believe that Fabian Perez is also in the running as his pictures are extremely sexy and sultry; lots of dancing tango style, cigarettes, drinking, passion......he's amazing.

Vladimir Rush also caught my eye but in a completely different way. He reminds me a lot of Dali:

I thought this photo "All Lit Up" by Todd White was super cute ( I got it from http://www.iankenny.com/) :

Peter Lik is also amazing as is his presentation. He takes beautiful photographs and then mounts them onto back lit frames......I couldn't find any on the net that would do him justice as you really have to see them in person to get the full affect. Below is a small photo of one of his galleries.

Last but not least Eugeny Lushpin. Again I could not find any of the paintings I really enjoyed by him on the net but this one will give you a taste of his style. I haven't a clue how he makes the light look so real it's amazing. ( from http://www.sensorium.no/)

I'm curious, who are your favorite artists???

Another fun filled week in Vegas though I must say the vacations are much tamer as the years fall upon me. We spent an extended period rather than the usual 4 days which I didn’t mind at all. The weather was 95 to 102 degrees and hot as hell. We did a lot of shopping and by shopping I mean browsing around……sadly I only purchased a few items and nothing really noteworthy. Three of us went to see O ( the Cirque Show that has been on my list for years) which of course did not disappoint, LD and I hit up Peepshow a few days later which was a rather sexy burlesque type of show featuring Mel B and Kelly Monaco.

The rest of the peeps arrived a few days later however at some point on the vacation almost every single one of us fell ill. Be it from the sun or food who knows but sadly it was not from beer consumption. We did spend one rather rowdy afternoon at Diablo’s Cantina where a spin of the wheel provided $3 treats a la margaritas and shots of tequila. We were in bed by 8pm that evening!!

After hour number 3 at the Cantina I could not keep track of which drink was on special. I'd order a Margarita only to find out it was now Coors light....meh give me both!!!

We stayed at the end of the strip which was not ideal as it was a 25 min walk to anything relatively worthwhile and I would stay more central next time as in the past. We did however stumble upon Cold Stone Creamery which I recognized from an episode of Oprah. It was quite possibly the best ice cream I have ever tasted, I tried “All the lovin with no oven” which consisted of chocolate cake batter ice cream, cookie dough bits, fudge and whipped cream all mushed together Yummmmm!!!

Oh yes and I forgot to mention the deep fried twinkies and oreo cookies that we found on Freemont Street.....seriously!!! LOVED the oreos!!!

LD and I of course made it our mission to stay up well into sunrise as per years past. Sadly we did not do as good.....a few years ago we left the bar at 9:30am.....this year it was 5am but the sun was starting to peak out nonetheless.

We arrived home to freaking 49 degree weather (today it’s 66) and I do believe my office is colder inside than it is outside….I have my space heater on! I could have stayed for longer just to enjoy the sun and relax as it wasn’t a typical kick your ass Vegas style trip it was much more laid back this go around. There’s always next year…..

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PS:

This guy cracked me up with his white socks and sandles....not to mention the drumstick hanging out of his back pocket WTF??? He was trashed and enjoyed dancing with his lady friend:

I also loved this truck decal filthy just filthy ;)

I just bought the cutest wedges ever!! I was actually out looking for a cheap black pair to replace my old ones however these caught my eye and of course I just had to have them. They're a lot shiner (more shiney?) than these photos show and super cute in person. Come to think of it these photos suck, you'll just have to take my word for it they're cute dammit!

Please excuse the naked toenails I'm getting my pedicure this weekend and wanted them free from polish until then.

I've had my eye on a few pairs of Fluevogs lately however they are soooo pricey and I'm not sure I would actually wear them enough to justify the cost. Most friends that I've shown have told me they are oooooogly but I dig them:

Whaddya think?? I find that men hate the Fluevogs that I own and women love them. They aren't conventionally sexy by any means; odd chunky heels, bizzare colours but they're fun and that's what matters!

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I haven't a clue why or how this turned into a shoe post. I had actually planned to talk about my poor listening skills. I had a client call the other day and at the end of our conversation he said "Sorry I missed our appointment" and I answered with "You're welcome" and hung up. I assumed he was going to say "Thanks" and blurted out my response without even listening to what he said. Oops! Do y'all every do that?? (I like to say Y'all sometimes, I think it's funny much to the dismay of others).

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Anyway cats I'm outta here after this weekend to enjoy the 95 degree weather and sip 99 cent margaritas because "It's 5 o'clock somewhere" God bless Vegas! See you in a week.
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PS If you're wondering why I have to put these ridiculous lines inbetween my paragraphs it's because Blogger isn't following my directions and is lumping everything into one big ass paragraph grrrr! WTF blogger, what the fuck??

It's been a rather busy week and of course will continue to be so this coming week as well. There are so many things that I need to get done but not enough hours in the day it seems. Granted I spent an entire day in bed nursing my hangover so really it's my own fault. I suppose that's what happens when you don't drink for over a month. I was all gung ho about my eating/drinking habits a few weeks ago and seems that I haven't been out whooping it up as per usual. I decided to have a night out......and paid for it dearly the next day.



Anyway, enough about that. I bought these beautiful bowls recently at this cute Japanese store. I just adore them!!

I was also given a rather large piece of chocolate by PP and when I say large I do mean large. It's from an enormous toblerone bar and apparently one triangle has approximately 2000 calories, yikes! Here it is beside one of my fruit cups to show the size.

I'm going away next week and I've been running around buying new clothes and trying to get myself relatively ready which seems to be taking forever. I'd rather have some idea of what I'm bringing rather than leaving it till the last minute as per usual. But alas I am sure that is exactly what is going to be happening.

I've been in good spirits as of late, I'm excited to be going away, the weather around here is warming up and I finally got my hair cut and highlighted. I had left it longer than I ever had before and it was starting to embarass me. I have a massage lined up this week, 1st pedicure of the year.....things are good!!

Rawbean brought up the possibility of the lotion lady bathing in the 7 bottles of hand cream which brought an old question to mind. If you could swim in any liquid at all.....what would you choose?? I may have asked this in the past forgive me as I forget but do indulge me regardless.

I'd like my answer to be beer, ketchup or tamarind sauce. In actuality I would probably choose something more along the lines of chocolate milk or melted milk chocolate. That would be delightful!!! I'm drooling just thinking about it!

I've been taking note of what people are purchasing at stores lately and I find the amount of items rather perplexing. For instance the woman in front of me at Shoppers (Drugstore) bought 7 bottles of Jergens hand lotion with the pump......it takes me close to 3 months to use one of those suckers sometimes longer. What the hell does she need 7 for? Such things do have an expiry date after all. Next my brow stared to furrow at Sobeys (grocery store) as I watched the woman in front of me place 20 yes 20 cans of Arizona Iced Tea on the conveyor belt. I'm sure she saw me judging her as my eyes expanded while counting the enormous cans. Those things are close to 700 ml each.


I'm not even going to mention the people I see with packages upon packages of TV dinners loading up their carts. Hungry Man seriously.....last time I checked the nutritional contents of a dinner it had well over 40 grams of fat and close to 900 calories. If that is all you're going to eat at least pretend that it's not and buy one or two at a time every day. Maybe throw in an orange for good measure. For the love of god don't fill up your entire cart with such "meals."



Okay now I'm getting off topic and rambling on about nutrition which nobody wants to be lectured on. Come to think of it, perhaps the Jergens lady had a store and was selling the lotion herself or perhaps the Arizona lady was having a party and needed mix. Who knows, but either way I was staring and surely making faces at their purchases cause to me Judgey Mc Judgey they seemed excessive.