So I'm finally back to feeling like a regular human being again. It's amazing how one slight movement can put me out for days at a time. I remember once picking up an empty grocery bag off of the floor and putting my back out for 5 days. It's hard to explain to those who do not have such issues but it can actually be debilitating for days at a time. I've tried to be careful over the years, bend at your knees, pick things up properly but every once in a while BAM I feel it go and my heart sinks as I know I will be in severe pain and have limited movement for who knows how long; sometimes it's a day or two other times closer to a week. It's probably been close to a year since I've put it out this badly, so at least I'm lucky in that respect.


It's actually quite interesting though how much I take for granted in my every day life when I'm feeling good. It doesn't matter if I drop something I can just pick it right back up, I can hop in and out of the tub, I can drive wherever I want, do whatever I want but when I'm hurt EVERYTHING is a gigantic chore. Seriously, you know it's bad when you go to the washroom and have to think "how the fuck am I going to .... you know....wipe..."! Okay TMI!!!


I was once talking to a woman pushing a man in a wheelchair and she had asked me if there was another way to get to a certain street without having to go down a very steep and busy hill. Unfortunately there was not and I felt terrible for the two of them. I remember her saying that we don't think of such things until we're faced with such difficulties and it's true. I myself would just walk right down that hill without a second thought and yet for them it was going to be next to impossible to get down that same hill.


I'm certainly not comparing my back issues to the man in the wheelchair but it's interesting how we go about our every day lives and it's not until we're faced with a difficulty that we realize how important our silly everyday movements are. I remember laying in bed day 2 of my pain and trying to no avail to get comfortable. Every movement sent what felt like stabbing electric shocks all over my body and yet while I was in pain I was still thankful that I could feel that pain. There are others who are not so lucky and I'm sure would give anything to be able to feel again, however unpleasant it may be. So I think about that and how grateful I am that while I'm in a hell of a lot of discomfort, it will pass and I will go about my life as before.

That will be the first entry of my Gratitude Journal......I'm thankful that I can feel!

As most of my close friends know, don't bother lending me anything that you want back in the near future! I have a tendency to borrow movies and books and then I hold onto them, sometimes for a few months, sometimes for a year without ever looking at them again. Oops! I have to be in the mood to want to sit down and watch a certain movie or to read a certain book. I had some time this weekend, lots of time to be exact to lay around and do just that as I really did a number on my back. I've been out of commission for a few days (and counting) and thought I might as well take advantage of some down time and watch a few flicks!

"This is a story of boy meets girl. The boy, Tom Hansen of Margate, New Jersey, grew up believing that he'd never truly be happy until the day he met the one. This belief stemmed from early exposure to sad British pop music and a total mis-reading of the movie 'The Graduate'. The girl, Summer Finn of Shinnecock, Michigan, did not share this belief. Since the disintegration of her parent's marriage she'd only loved two things. The first was her long dark hair. The second was how easily she could cut it off and not feel a thing. Tom meets Summer on January 8th. He knows almost immediately she is who he has been searching for. This is a story of boy meets girl, but you should know upfront, this is not a love story."

( From 500 Days of Summer)

The first film I watched was 500 Days of Summer and I really really enjoyed each and every moment as it was unique and yet portrayed characters that everyone can relate to. I loved the split screen where they showed the "Expectations" and the "Reality" of what the character wanted to happen and what actually happened during a party. I liked that it wasn't a typical romantic film but showed a more realistic view of relationships. It didn't follow a sequence of events but rather went back and forth between various days throughout their time together. I was rooting for Tom the whole time and have actually felt like him at certain points in my life, maybe that's why I wanted him to come out on top so badly! On the flip side I could also relate to Summer and how she was feeling, she was upfront with what she wanted or more like what she didn't want and thus the story goes. I also must do a shout out to the soundtrack umm hello who doesn't love the Smiths and I love love love that song There Goes the Fear by the Doves!

The 2nd film I watched was Across the Universe and must say I was rather disappointed. I wasn't sure what to expect as I wasn't sure what exactly the movie was about, I just recall seeing a trailer for it and thinking that it looked interesting. In reality it just didn't do anything for me and I found myself checking the time to see how much longer it was going to be on for. Don't get me wrong there were some visually captivating parts and artsy fartsy scenes that I quite enjoyed. Some of the songs fit brilliantly and really captured the emotions of the characters and yet others I found fell flat. The army scene was quite cool, I liked the end of Strawberry Fields and the following clip I quite enjoyed as well. But as a whole I found it was hit and miss for me.

Ugh ohhhhhh that's the weather forecast for tomorrow! I'm a smart cookie and had *sigh* my snow tires put on last week so I'll be ready for the fluffy stuff shall it fall. I don't particularly enjoy winter what with the chill, slush and ice! It makes me want to hibernate for a few months, why just this morning I could not get out of bed as I was sooooooo warm and cozy. It was still dark out as it shall be from now on (daylight savings time this weekend) and my head rested on my pillow far past my alarm which is a rarity.

Rather than mourn the end of summer and fall, I shall try to look on the bright side and give thanks to the comforts that winter brings!

The leaves changing colour

I get it I get it, this is still a fall photo.......I have to ease myself into this you know!!!

Mmmmmmm hot chocolate with marshmallows! I tend to drink a lot of tea during the cold months but also enjoy a yummy sweet treat like this every once in a while! I also quite enjoy drinking out of horrendously over sized mugs mmm mmmm mmmmmmmmm!

I love love love sitting by a toasty fire! Inside, outside, wood burning or electric I love them all! Just last week I was sitting with a friend catching up, the room lit by nothing but the glow of a fire, it was heavenly!

I also love to slip into my comfies aka lulu sweats (they're like my uniform in the winter) and watch the snow fall out the window, I find it mesmerizing and strangely comforting. I do not have any desire to actually venture out into the snow and yet I can still appreciate its beauty.

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I do plan to stay active this winter and would like to go skiing more often than I do ummm hello once in 15 years just doesn't cut it!!! I just bought a 20 class pass to a yoga studio and I swear to you all that I am giving that damn P90X an honest try!

Cheers to winter, bring it on!!!